Wish You Had Better Listeneing Skills?

Joe Weinlick
Posted by in Career Advice


In an age where digital messaging reigns supreme, highly developed listening skills can set you apart from the competition. Effective listening helps you maximize personal interactions, create strong relationships and benefit from the knowledge of your colleagues. While some people are natural listeners, others must work to develop the skill. Luckily, with a few simple strategies, you can improve your ability to take in and process information.

Minimize Distractions

Distractions are the enemy of listening — if you've ever tried to have a conversation with someone who checks her phone every few seconds, you know how frustrating and demoralizing it can be. The first step in developing better listening skills is to eliminate the things that disrupt your focus. Before an important conversation, silence your phone and turn off all vibrations. Turn off your computer, and shut the door to your office. This step communicates respect and tells the other person that his words are important to you.

Listen, Process, Answer

During a conversation, it's natural to start thinking of a reply immediately. In the process, your focus shifts to your own thoughts rather than what the other person is saying. As you're building listening skills, focus first on taking in information without formulating a response. After the person has finished speaking, take a moment to process the information, ask follow-up questions and come up with a thoughtful reply. In doing so, you can avoid interrupting and ensure the other person has time to express his thoughts completely.

Notice Nonverbal Cues

Paying attention to nonverbal cues is an important step in improving your listening skills. After all, the way a person says something is often just as important as the content. As the other person is speaking, notice his tone. Does it match the words that are coming out of his mouth? If not, it may indicate that his true opinions are lurking beneath the surface, that there's more to the story or that he's unhappy with the situation. Other signs of discontent or hidden emotion include closed-off body language: Tightly crossed arms, slumped shoulders and the refusal to make eye contact can all indicate trouble. These cues can add to your understanding of the situation and help you identify touchy subjects or topics that require more investigation.

Stay Open and Engaged

In the end, listening is not about you — it's about the other person. A crucial part of developing better listening skills is staying open and engaged in the conversation. Show empathy by mirroring and validating the person's feelings. If the person says he is fighting with a colleague, a simple "that must be difficult for you" lets him know you understand the struggle. Avoid inserting your own opinions, experiences and ideas into the person's narrative. When a person feels that you are listening actively and without judgement, he may feel safer expressing his true thoughts. This process can improve all your personal interactions and make the people in your life feel more accepted.

Great listening skills take practice and conscious effort. By working on each aspect of listening gradually, you can make it a natural part of your professional communication style.


Image courtesy of stockimages at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

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  • Milena N.
    Milena N.

    ......to listen is the only that i hear last some years....have no idea why ,but fact ,also keep my atantione all the time when i meet /rare/options for human conversation,all the time open for understanding ...and still my skills and potential are not relevant ...found this very strange

  • Shirley  Baller
    Shirley Baller

    Check your spelling....ugh

  • T. M. Woody W.
    T. M. Woody W.

    You mean listening skills? or

  • Nancy Anderson
    Nancy Anderson

    @Melissa it doesn't hurt to put that on your resume and/or cover letter. Every little bit helps. Especially if one of the qualifications that the company is looking for is great communication skills. Can't have great communications skills without great listening skills. Best of luck.

  • Melissa C.
    Melissa C.

    I agree with you. thoûgh I never thoûght to put that I had good listening ßklls or I have good active listening skills on my resume.​

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